As for me, I live and work with my mom. She has played both roles well for me - a colleague at work and a mom at home. Because we're always together, there are times we don't have anything to talk about (because she already knows what had happened during my day) and there are times, just like any other families - we clash.
I remember an incident happened just last June break, we were in the Philippines. She was asking me for something and I answered her just as usual (more like a reply to a friend - yet still polite) then she just said "minsan kung sumagot ka, parang pinagmumukha mo akong tanga eh. parang ginagago mo ko" I was dumbfounded. I didn't go home for days - I was scared meeting her again. I reflected during those times I wasn't home - I then realized that maybe sometimes, out of too much familiarity with each other as colleagues, I forget that she is still my mom. I had to watch out more of my language.
Since she got here a year after I did, she has always depended on me when we go anywhere. I think I am partly to be blamed that she was not able to fully learnt the language because I was always there for her - doing all the translations, talking, haggling and stuff. The language barrier hindered her from getting out of the house or do her own things outside the house. I had to always tag along with her. I would be a hypocrite if I'd say I don't mind going with her always. There are times it's okay - like going to the market or going shopping or going for a spa, but there are also times I wish I didn't have to go.
Another thing that she's dependent on me is going around the city - even just around our subdivision. She relied solely on me with this. At times, she admits that she intentionally doesn't pay much attention to directions because she could easily drag me to places. I let this happen because somewhere at the back of my mind, I really don't want her to go by herself in this strange city with her poor local language skills, because when people can't understand her, she talks to them in Tagalog... hehehehhe.
Don't get me wrong. I love my mom, but this morning, we clashed again - twice. She woke me up and asked me if I will be going with her in her meeting with her dept. I got up, sat at the dining table and ate my breakfast - 40 mins before her meeting. She mentioned something about her thoughts on the picture she saw in fb. Her remark was kinda off and I told her in a nice way to just mind her own business and not give meaning to what she saw in the picture - one. When I was about to finish preparing to go, I was starting to think of what to do when she will be having her meeting. I wasn't invited but I knew it was okay if I tagged along. I was a bit hesitant to go already. Just when I was setting up my laptop before I leave, it acted weirdly. It kind of upset me actually - and seeing her waiting pressured me to move faster. It was past the time of her meeting. Then I told her of my hesitation. I told her to sms me when the meeting is over so I can pick her up and go to the mall to accompany her to buy some school stuff. She suddenly raised her voice, obviously irritated - asking how to go to the meeting place (it was just 2 blocks away from our house) I asked if she can remember the 2 alleys we always take for a short cut where there will be a street by the end of the 2nd alley, she just had to go straight that street, turn left and the house will be there. She can't figure it out. She said she'll just ride a trike. I then offered to walk her to the place. She suddenly turned her back on me and immediately went out of the house. I shouted the address to her, because I knew she doesn't know the exact house number, and without that, she can't clearly say where she wanted to go.
After more than 2 hours, I received her sms. I went to where she was and when I got there, the meeting had to extend. So I sat in the TV room and watched the movie, ate a bit, talked a bit with people there. She came up to me and talked to me as if nothing happened. When we do that, it's one way of saying that we're okay already. Still I wasn't talking as much. Not that I'm angry or what, just as usual, I just didn't have anything to say.
Then now just before we headed off to our own rooms, she asked - what time are we going to the market tomorrow? I answered politely - around 7 or 8.
oh well, I can't turn her down - it's my duty as a house mate to go to the market - and my duty as a daughter to be with her. After all, I am the only family she has here, and lucky enough, compared to my siblings, I get to be smothered more than they are and much even more luckier that I still have a mom.
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